Everyone says I'm going to do it again, like an addict looking for the next high but I'm not so sure. Whenever I'm on an airplane now I don't think of the meetings I am going to, but how fast until I am back home. I wash my face daily and get more than six hours of sleep a night, I often go to bed by 10pm and wake up at the times that I used to go to sleep. I'm no longer a founder and as sad as it is, its refreshing to realize I escaped the entire experience alive. Becoming an unfounder wasn't an overnight experience, its probably the same way someone from an addiction must think about how long it has been since they were clean and while I don't know the exact day I stopped being a founder, I consider it to be November 5th, 2013, the day I was checked into a Manhattan ER and hooked up to a I.V of powerful antibiotics while a ConsumerBell attorney texted me in a flurry about a recent legal settlement and the entire room smelled like bleach from the saline and meds being pumped into my body. "I am done" I told myself and not in the frantic ways I had done before but in a calm, exhausted exhale. Besides I had signed an employment contract days earlier, this time I meant it.
So what I want to say in a non-whimsical way is that being an unfounder is quite the opposite of how it all started and way less romantic, but its nice when meeting other founders who need help and you can offer them advice and they explain, "No but really you don't know how it is" and you calmly sit there and think, "Yes, yes I do."